for a world that doesnt exist
for a universe that stands still
contact:
relacon@gmail.com
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DAILY INSPIRATION:
this day, i pray
this day, i smile
this day, i wish u all the best!
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wat u want to abt me?
and why?
how much can u find out,
when i dun even know
who i am?
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Sunday, November 28, 2004
hahaha
congrats my dear cousin (pingpingpingping)
love u
be in happiness forever!!!!!
hehehehe..
i wanna to be a bridesmaid for ur wedding!!!!!!
and if it is held (wherever is RCA) haha...snowy..
go sweden too..
=o)
=o)
10:41 PM |
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suddenly i miss alot of pple
i miss kelvin (who sent me an email with only like a few lines of greetings)
i miss jodarling (whose life i dun seem to know anymore?)
i miss henky (who i dun even know if he is staying in singapore after graduation)
okie i miss hian kai too (who is busy with his studies and juggling! and everytime i see pple performing, i just think of hk and his devils' stick)
i miss the bridge gang
coz i dun see them nowadays
hrmm
oh well
HK: hahha....drop me a msg of ur house number? i might call u..i still have USA calling card
henky: bet u dun even read my blog! hahahaha
jodarling n kelvin: hahha...shall we organise bridge?
maybe u know, i should email them
hahaha
it is actually err, faster
oh well after i come back from bintan
and i need to organise another outing for the void deckers!
*faintz* tat would be in late dec when tse yang comes back from his trip
and i wonder if i should bother
to ________________________
hahahah
never mind...
feeling the odd mood
it is never never nice, to have a sudden emotional attachment to some1
and it is NEVER good, but the pt is, i have to get out of it myself
and on a lighter note! haha
x'mas aint over and i have already purchased a zara light dirty green sexy top with beads and i think it is a camisole like top, for my CNY
and gosh, time really flies.
it is my nephew's bday next week
and he is turning 2 (24 months) yrs old
i wonder y time flies so fast.
even shaowei went "gosh..the last time, he was just borned isnt it?"
and i bought him this winnie the pooh and tigger balloon tat bogs up and down
hahaha....
and this is wat i am going to teach him
"u know how a balloon floats and soemtimes fly away? coz being inflated by a gas (which u cant see and sometimes can only feel) that is lighter than air, thus the tendency to go above air. and wat is air? it is everywhere, wrapping u, and u need tat to live...for in the balloon contains helium, an inert gas which means a gas that does not react chemically and poses no danger as an element. and now, with helium in ur balloon, tat is y u, who likes it to bog up and down and punch with it, becoz it floats with helium in the air. but it is being held down by a balloon weight so tat it doesnt float away up into the sky..."
i miss dancing.
and it is back when i come back from bintan!!
and i miss alot of things
oh well
one of those special nites
time to do some housekeeping!
i have so much to say, but dunno
i really wish to tell some1, hey, u know, life is like this, dun have to keep harping over it
sometimes things, just meant to be a regret in life, but we all will live with it. nothing is wrong or right when it is over. coz it doesnt mean much anymore.
forgiveness is hard, fighting for happiness is even harder
this post is geting too long hahaha and i'm getting alittle burnt
next week may be worse.
oh well...
1:11 AM |
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Saturday, November 27, 2004
think i finally got a gist of it
dunno how to say
sigh.
no way.
i must learn not to let my emotions run wild again
no way.
sigh
2:31 AM |
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Wednesday, November 24, 2004
toking abt maturity and stability
1) maturity is all abt the ability to think of a certain level and capable to do things in a logical, based on experience kind of characteristics
and alot of times, maturity is accumulative and is categorised into different kind
i suppose many do not agree..but when u start to work, or being thru alot of hardships,
made u mature in many different ways, seeing things differently
maybe due to circumstances i am seeing, reading, experiencing, i wonder wat makes u think if one is a mature human to survive, to make the world around himself/herself a better place?
but i have to admit, when one starts to work, u either become at peace with urself and the world
or u just simply go deeper into the magician's hat...
sometimes i wonder, one's thinking determines one's life principles, motto and direction.
the drive behind tat motorised human, is all just tat ticks u to move, to wanting more than u can expect. but with that maturity u deem to have, is it all possible tat one fails to see the bigger picture of simple happiness, of having that level of maturity to make u more understanding than more narrowminded?
i wonder
2) stability -- yeah yeah..i wun bother to quote from the dictionary which i guess, i would end up saying there isnt stability in this world for it is just striving towards equilibrium and stability is something tat only comes in a while, but becoz of the constant fluctuations in life, that becomes tat "stability" if u allow urself to draw out.
tat was how i felt when i was chatting with gilbert and xin yesterday.
all of us, are surrounded by all sort of pple, and pple from all walks of life, facing their own set of formulated life and problems that they can never shake off.
but in our self created problems, we mellow over the seriousness and desperation of the situations we face, and start to question how we are goign to get out of it.
while outsiders sit outside, looking in and start to luff and asking u to stop thinking worse of everything. but yet they themselves cant doit themselves.
so with every set of individualism we see everyday, amongst our frens our family,
we linger ard the similar problems under different circumstances, and start to savour the hardships, the smiles we face.
but it is just all an vicious cycle
stability, isnt maintaining life at the peak, or the high end at all times.
but stability is the capability to maintain composure in times of crisis, in times of need
in times of providing a good sense of reasoning to a particular problem
the sine curve, no matter how high and how low it goes, it is stable for it is regular
maybe all of us wont have regular life patterns, but at least, there is a sense of regularity in this time of chaos. it is the only thing tat never changes, change.
i am only glad that i have frens, wiling to listen to me, allowing me to get all emotional and letting me luff out loud without worrying abt who i am being viewed as.
maybe just like jasper would say "u love some1 for who she is and u would want to make her happy when she is sad"
i guess, being special to a person, is important.
coz u feel it
JA goes "if there is some one makes me feel so special, tat is her being special too"
yesh...it seems tat it may be circulating ard BGRs, but i have already felt the love pple can have
like how much xin and i would try to help gilbert find a good girl, for he is a dear fren who pampers us and amuses us with his nutty nonsensical mind.
maturity and stability go hand in hand.
not becoz of how u would wish to impress some1, but how u extend ur capability at suitable times to excerise and offer good advice or silence, to pple u care for.
the world goes round for a reason, and is imperfect for a perfect reason:
to see a person to grow, to love and to give.
it is nothing if everything is perfect.
it is nothing if everything is at its best
it is something when u actually step out to rise above ur predicament
choice isnt a choice, but a destiny.
7:54 PM |
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Sunday, November 21, 2004
人言可畏 this is how i felt now when i go out with JA we are avoiding something tat we dun even intend? stupid.. i totally understand the above saying and we felt so silly abt it suddenly?! time to wake up man!
1:37 AM |
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Saturday, November 20, 2004
Me, myself and i
beyonce
All the ladies if you feel me help me sing it out.
Verse 1
I can't believe I believed everything we had would last
So young and naive of me to think she was from your past
Silly of me to dream of one day having your kids
Love is so blind it feels right when it's wrong
I can't believe I fell for your schemes I'm smarter than that
So dumb and naive to believe that with me your a changed man
Foolish of me to compete when you cheat with loose women
It took me some time but now I moved on
Because I realized I got
Chorus
Me, Myself and I that's all I got in the end
That's what I found out
And there ain't no need to cry
I took a vow that from now on
I'm gonna be my own best friend
Repeat
So controlling to say that you love me but you don't
Your family told me one day I would see it on my own
Next thing I know I'm dealing with your three kids in my home
Love is so blind it feels right when it's wrong
Now that it's over stop calling me come pick up your clothes
Ain't no need to front like your still with all your homies know
Even your very best friend try to warn me on the low
Took me some time but now I am strong
Because I realized I got
Chorus
Repeat
Bridge
Got me, myself and I
(I know that I will never disappoint myself)
I must have cried a thousand times
(All the ladies if you feel me help me sing it out)
I can't regret time spent with you
(Yeah you hurt me but I learned alot along the way)
So I have vowed to make it through
(After all the rain you'll see the sun come out again)
Repeat
Oh (oh) oh (oh) oh (oh) oh (oh)
Oh (oh) oh (oh) oh (oh) woo woo (woo woo)
Yeah
Chorus
Now I've got me, myself and I (Me, myself and I)
I must have cried a thousand times (I have cried so many times)
I can't regret time spent with you (I can't regret time spent with you)
So I have vowed to make it through (After all the rain you'll see the sun come again)
Music Fades
this song always rocks
and putting this up is a tribute to a girl
who remembers her fren and wrote a song abt her
1:05 AM |
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Thursday, November 18, 2004
i think
i am just going to work my ass off
everytime they say tat
i dunno y they say it
yeah maybe i am sensitive
and i know, they know i am sensitive
and whenever i get irritated,
they'll say "i just say only..dun mean anything"
so i would rather not say anything
coz afterall, i am supposed to have gotten used to it?
i really want to cry
this whole week has been a wreck
i dun wish to lose my focus.
but it is all in a mess?
i dun wish to think
i am just going to do my piano hw
tat's all i have left anyway
i have to piah thru to get tat cert
after this i think i have to save another 500 bucks for performing dipolma
yesh..it is 500 bucks and rising every yr.
suffer now, enjoy later
8:05 PM |
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Wednesday, November 17, 2004
in search for the song
and realised it wasnt found on the regular website that i frequent
which means no lyrics
for tat beautiful song
but it rings in my head
the drums, the sad voice tat blasted the silent of the heart
her eyes, of how much she yearns
the way she tries to mimick it
and the bottle of red win she has gunned down,
the packet of cigarettes she has been constantly smoking
and weirdly,
i just briefly mentioned something and it seem that
there's always tat loss look in every1's eyes, once in their lifetime
since i cant find the lyrics to tat song
i shall go sleep
questionable
for a wink to last the nite
for a blink to the dawn
for a click to the evening
1:07 AM |
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Monday, November 15, 2004
we have to sit opposite each other
we each won 12 and 11 bucks!
hahah!but i split w a colleague though she din play much
but the other girls lost quite a bit....in all 23 bucks i guess
hahahaha...
oh dear my dear
and errr.
i think my sms will die on me soon again.
next DATE to note : a nice western restaurant! and my cheesecake
(but i think i have to reserve the cheesecake for shaowei. hahaha b4 he complains
and time to get take a slot out for gilbert..if not he thinks i am avoiding him....
r u reading this?!=oP )
i miss jo and stephie...
sigh...
1:09 PM |
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Saturday, November 13, 2004
i am a suitable candidate, but aint running for any competition.
so, wat kind of candidate am i trying to be?
3:03 AM |
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Tuesday, November 09, 2004
sick
very sick
1:47 PM |
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Sunday, November 07, 2004
I AM THE PERFECT LOVER
lovepredictor
hahahahahhaah
of coz
i can cook when u r in for good food, play the piano when u r troubled, dance with u to chase the blues, give u tons of hugs and kisses, go backpacking with u ard the world.
i am the "there's always a woman behind every successful man" girl.
and i take care of myself and financially independent (sooon sooon)
hahaha
i am so totally amused.
hahaha
am i "selling" myself?
no.
u have to prove u r worth this perfect lover
i have to be earned!
ahaha
Jodarling: ahaha..this is soooo bloody amusing.
cant believe myself and dun forget to check out friendster for ur next "hot" date!
*winkz* sadly not with me, hahaha...okie dun forget 1.78 m tall!!!! hey...dad's a doctor hor!
1:39 AM |
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Saturday, November 06, 2004
i totally realised wat this whole thing is all abt
if there's anything, in any way
tat some1 isnt happy, or cant stand it anymore
**this part of the post has been censored**
*BREATHE*
orh damn it
i think i am getting the whole gist of it.
forget it.
think this is more important than anything else
my 50 yr plan
is not going to spoil
PREPARE FOR THE WORST
HOPE FOR THE BEST
but i am already seeing the worst.
god
1:23 AM |
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Monday, November 01, 2004
hrmm
things are getting out of hand!!!!!
argh
i hate tat
"orh i rather just spend my bday with u la...the rest like very mafan...keep it simple lor"
*BREATHE!!!!!!*
how am i to siam this?!?!?
arghh.....
it doesnt work on me one...
sigh..
not aagain...gotta use wat i used last time
where got pple bday TREAT others??
i refused......must treat him one...dotdotdot
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when u sort of like tat some1's compnay...u r soooo scared tat person (the opp sex) gets the wrong idea!!!! but u dun wish to hurt his feelings...so u have decided to make it more honest
"err..ur bday only me and u very weird lor..i feel weirdl uneasy...the next time then we go eat somewhere else la....somewhere more central"
"aiyah...me no ulterior motive...my frens really not free" hahaha
okie, i take the words ....dotdotdot....bad experience b4...sorry leh.
better clear air man....hahaha....i still wanna my dalily dosage of emails and sms...to kill boredom at work!
AND
i dun think i wanna a guy who stays in YCK to drive me back to JURONG...
coz i NEVER like pple to send me back....
even ephriam gor send me i also not happy...coz like mafan pple like this..
yet i dun mind sending pple back...dotdotdot...not becoz i like to drive la
=oP
i dun speed anymore!
=o)
no more 140 km/h(which i dun think i ever hit tat..coz think my car will flip...mah said so though..and i know went to 110 leh...)
everything under 100km/h (expressways are 90 which is wat i keep too..unless some bugger decides to hog...)
heehee....
11:28 PM |
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